there is some universal list of "things you must discuss with your partner before you get married". the list is as follows.
- money
- religion
- sex
- goals
- children
Stances:
- Caitlin: pro-housekeeper. (to do the deep cleaning, not the picking up)
- Dan- no-housekeeper
- Caitlin: we are so so busy right now and house duties are being overlooked by both of us. either we keep putting it off until school is out, or we hire someone for 10-15$ an hour to make our lives a little easier.
- Dan: it is the principle, it is our mess we should be responsible for picking it up, regardless of how busy we are.
I definitely understand what Dan is saying, but I feel like if we can afford it right now and it will ease our burden it is worth it....but maybe I just feel that way because I grew up with Martha coming every other Thursday for 20 years. So what do you think?
p.s. this really isn't a huge roadblock
12 thoughts:
No housekeeper. Bourgeois/borderline exploitative.
Pro housekeeper. I've been considering it for months but haven't gone forward... and every time I glance down at the dusty baseboards I remember it.
You guys shouldn't get one, but you should pay for one for us.
My mom assigned us chores all while growing up and we still had a housekeeper on and off for 20 or so years to do the hard-to-manage things. Sometimes we'd have one come for four hours once a week, sometimes an hour a week, etc. depending on how things were going financially. My mom has a woman come for an hour every other week now because even though she does a fine job of keeping the house clean by herself, she can't always keep up while working, doing her calling, etc.
I think that it's a great idea, because I can understand the frustration of having a messy house that you don't have time to deal with, and a dirty house adds to the stress of everything else. The only ugly fights Robbie and I have gotten into (ok, I'm being dramatic, but they get heated) have had to do with cleaning.
Anyway, they're inexpensive to hire, like you said, and I think that the pro-housekeeper stance comes from people who grew up in southern California, haha. Also, I don't understand how it's exploitative if housekeeping is how someone earns their money. Housekeepers (at least in Monrovia) run pretty tight ships and pretty sophisticated businesses. But I'm probably too bourgeois to understand why someone might not agree.
That comment was way too long. Sorry.
If I could afford it, I totally would hire someone to come a couple times a month. I mean, I agree with Dan that everyone should clean up after themselves, but when you're busy, you can only do so much. Other things take priority over housework. But you still want to live in a clean house, right?! So, my vote is keep things tidy as much as you can yourselves, but if you can afford it and are too busy to do it, hire someone to come do the big stuff. Definitely.
I don't think it's exploitive. You are providing someone who is willing to work an opportunity to do so.
Nikole and I have had the same discussion, she thinks the same way as you, and I think the same way as Dan.
But I understand both viewpoints. I would say, if you honestly don't have the time, or if is starting to become a strain on your marriage, it's best just to hire someone to come and do it.
I think its your duty to your country to hire one to help stimulate the economy. Shame on Dan for trying to keep us in a recession.
ha ha. anonymous wins.
seriously, though, dan's principle is a noble one, but it sounds like you'd both be happier with a neater house. you can always just hire a housekeeper *temporarily* until school is out and you have time to clean up yourselves.
Get one FOR SURE. When you are soooo busy why spend the little spare time that you get together cleaning baseboards and scrubbing tubs?? There is a difference between not picking up after yourself and not having time for deep cleaning. Dan will come around.... I can feel it!!! :) Haa haa...
so by that logic, if you break your arm snowboarding,you have to set it yourself. If you shear a shower head off, spend 6 hours trying to fix it. believe it or not, experienced housekeepers actually know what they are doing and are paid very nicely(>$12-15/hr TAXFREE) to do it. study Adam Smith's law of comparative advantage.Bottom line is to do what you do well and pay people to do what they do well.
so by that logic, if you break your arm snowboarding,you have to set it yourself. If you shear a shower head off, spend 6 hours trying to fix it. believe it or not, experienced housekeepers actually know what they are doing and are paid very nicely(>$12-15/hr TAXFREE) to do it. study Adam Smith's law of comparative advantage.Bottom line is to do what you do well and pay people to do what they do well.
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